Sleep?

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one.  ~Leo J. Burke

A ruffled mind makes a restless pillow.  ~Charlotte Brontë 

The worst thing in the world is to try to sleep and not to.  ~F. Scott Fitzgerald

When I lay down at night, I want to melt into my bed and peacefully drift off to sleep. I want to be comforted by the warmth of my pillow and greeted by my sheets and blankets, you know... with a big hug.  I want my day to be over and my tomorrow to wait for me. I want my mind to be blank and my heart to slow down. After my day, I am truly exhausted.  My muscles are tired and I am in need of rest.  

Last night, I laid down. I felt pain in my shoulders and neck. My mind was restless and my heart sent out anxiety throughout my body and straight down to my toes. Tossed and turned until the comfortable position wore out and the cycle started all over again.  Hours and hours passed by.  Once in a while this type of insomnia settles in and my body is a slave to it. It can be cured by a release of emotion (tears) or a pain killer with a label followed by the letters PM.  But I wasn't in a bad mood and I had the meds the previous night.  I am not a fan of being an addict, so I had to fall asleep....all by myself.

Four hours later, it happened.

...He grants sleep to those He loves. Psalm 127:2b.

Do not be anxious about anything. Phil. 4:6a. Anything- even sleep.

It's not the stress of my days. It's not the stress of my tomorrows.  I don't list all the things I have to do. I don't worry all night. In fact I have a positive attitude (well, usually). I keep thinking...I am going to fall asleep soon (and it doesn't happen.) The benefits- I cling to my Savior...for peace and hope.  He has blessed my with a surprisingly OKAY day and still more hope that tonight will be better.

I am reminded to honor God with my body (1 Cor. 6:20) and He will take care of the rest.

Goodbye Izzy ~ Hello Jersey

Today we said good-bye to  Izzy. She was 2 months old in this picture.  

She was so tiny we lost several times under furniture and blankets.

Though still a puppy, we had to find her a new home.

Izzy had more energy than all my kids.

Alayna will miss her, but she is thankful to have lots of pictures.

Alayna will always remember Izzy.

We found Jersey at the animal shelter.  We never expected to find a puppy on our first trip.

She is Boxer-
Pit Bull mix and is 3 months old.

Gentle, sweet, and willing to learn. But, yes...more puppy training.

We hope to make Jersey a big part of our family.

Never a Dull Moment

Eric: Currently obsessed with painting his bedroom. After school ended, Mimi grabbed 3'x2' paper that teachers were throwing away. He soon discovered how much fun it was to fill those pages with Superhero stick figures. The newest idea- taping the paper on the walls of his bedroom. I shut the door and cross my fingers. With his sisters by his side, they paint many abstracts. The entire perimeter of his room is filled. The girls paint rainbows...brown ones. Eric's stick figures are transforming into super sized Hulks, Things, and Spidey.


Alayna: Rediscovering the art of Little People, one of her favorites. She has always loved putting them in the house and creating scenes. I often think she recreates scenes from TV. Her voice is low and as she pretends and whispers, she is very theatrical. Now they have a new spin. The Fisher Price dollhouse figures and Barbies are all thrown together to play. (Until clean up time of course when they all go their separate ways.) Right now they are hanging out with the Superheroes and Monster Trucks.

Cailin: She is a little wanderer. Never really sure if she wants to play with Eric or Alayna. Her favorite has been the Barbies. I find her with a Barbie and Ken. They hug. They dance. Lots of whispers. I do wonder what goes on in her head. She is quite random. Last night, again with a fever (some sort of belly issue: bright green poop today), she had dreams of a little gorilla and a fly. She woke screaming about the animals in her bed. Her wish to have a dream of a thousand babies that look like Ella came true. She went to bed that night asking to smell Daddy's armpits. She even asked if she could make a chocolate banana smoothie for Santa. I really do wonder what goes on in her head!


Ella: Ten days straight on the potty. Successful at least twice a day. And her new thing is to push the container of play animals over to the SpiderMan couch. She climbs up on it, swings her arms and leaps into the air. Yes, into the air. And lands with a belly flop straight out onto the couch. Cheered on by her siblings and laughing so hard she can barely stand up...she does it again and again and again.

Random Uploads

Savings for Sanity

So a couple of weeks ago, my sister-in-law briefly mentioned that friend of hers as a hobby of couponing. It inspired me to save some money and ever since I have been clipping away, from the paper and from the Internet. I admit that I think I've gone overboard. Coupons are organized in a binder with labels for every category in baseball sleeves. It includes a section for receipts, for my shopping list, for WIC checks, and for a weekly meal planner. Searching through the web I found store sales with matching coupons. Work? Oh yeah. But I saved money. In the last month I have bought $225 worth of groceries and other items at 4 different stores. I have spent only $99.


Today we ventured out to the Farmers Market, then onto CVS, then onto Publix, then Winn Dixie. Last stop: Sonic. Normally shopping with all four little ones is quite smooth. And when I say smooth, I mean the level of "I wants," complaints, tantrums and so on, is tolerable. The many, "Are they all yours?" are usually accompanied by "They are all behaving so well." Today- not so much.

Please! Please! Donuts! Can I have a toy? (Scream from Ella.) Can we get a movie? Ice Cream!!!!! Mommy, she pinched me! Well he hit me! Move over there's no room! (Scream from Ella). He tugs. She pulls. Can I push the cart? (More screams.) Can I push? Can I push? (Screams from Cailin.) Goldfish dumped everywhere! Looks, looks, and more looks from people. (Screams from Ella and Cailin.) Mommy, I have to go potty! NOW! Stop hitting her. Its not funny! Can we get a movie? We never get a toy!


We get into the car. I SCREAM! We still weren't finished and I couldn't take it anymore. I admit bad thoughts were running through my mind. I also admit not very nice things were rolling off my tongue. With one store left, they older two redeemed themselves. The younger two- not so much.


Riding home, I had a fresh cheesy greasy burger in my hand and three kids in the back with syrup dripping down their faces and all over their car seats from their French Toast sticks and one baby screaming her lungs out. I already have a list of all the things I forgot to buy. And I already have kids telling me they are hungry.


I am thankful for the receipts that I have. Its the proof I that saved bunches of money even if I traded in my sanity for it.

Blog? What Blog?

When should I blog? What should I write about? Kids, chaos, coupons? It seems sometimes that the thought of writing it all down is intimidating, especially when I haven't written in a while. Should I backtrack and write of the busyness that has kept me from blogging? Should I write about one child and one memory? Should I write something inspirational or something silly? To find one's voice as a writer is difficult. I keep journals, mostly devoted to scripture and prayers, but looking back in them I see funny side notes and cute sayings from my kids. I could write about mom tips and day-to-day life with four kids. I could write about missing-the-mark as a mom sometimes. I do believe a good blog should have a distinctive voice with good character. Focus on specific topic would be great too. But life isn't that neat and organized. It's not neat at all. So here's to random entries... Yes, about kids, chaos and coupons. Yes, about busyness. I can backtrack if I want to. I can quote my Savior if I want to. I can express my emotions. And I can tell the ins and outs of my day. To blog can be exercise. Letting something, anything, go, is therapeutic.


On that note, I'll share this. It's quiet here. My three "oldest" children have spent one day at my parents' house. I miss them. Though earlier in the week I was PMSing really bad and they really annoyed me. I have since gotten my period and ache all over, but my emotions are settling and I really miss them. NO OFFENSE to anyone, but I honestly don't know what people do all day. The clock is ticking so slowly here without the kids. Yes, there is no wrestling matches, name calling or whining. But what am I supposed to do? Moments like this help me to realize that it's important to have hobbies and interests as a Momma. I did attempt to organize some recipes (I like to cook and organize.) I did attempt to rest. (I watched recorded episodes of the Next Food Network Star). I cleaned the house. I started to clean Ella's closet to prepare it for 18 month old clothes. I opted not to go into Eric's very messy room. I went to the Dollar General to use bunches of coupons. I even took Ella to the potty. TWICE. (That's a story for another day...went potty everyday for 6 days now....ahhh!)


Thankful for the quiet. Bracing myself for their return. Learning to remember that I need to let myself grow. We focus so much sometimes on helping our kids develop interests that we forget about our own.


Here's to more blogging. Recording life as it is. Messy and random.


I really wish I bought myself some chocolate at the store today. I am now going to dig through cabinets and drawers. I am very hungry.